Is it just me, or does Donald Tusk sound more like the protagonist of a contemporary American novel than the next Prime Minister of Poland? “Donald Tusk” could be a plutocrat in a fat Tom Wolfe paperback, or a sidekick of Oscar Crease in William Gaddis’ superb A Frolic Of His Own.

Mr Tusk’s Civic Platform is likely to form a government in coalition with the Peasants’ Party. Why haven’t we got a Peasants’ Party here? I’d vote for a peasant to be put in charge of things. Not a farmer, nor a Countryside Allianceista, but a proper peasant, in a smock, with a piece of straw in their mouth, and a stock of folk wisdom which I may well find incomprehensible. There must be a peasant called Hoouhmne who could be persuaded to run for office, the sort of Prime Minister who would award honours for the cultivation of Curiously Lumpen And Hirsute Root Vegetables so that Miss Hathorn wouldn’t have to strike her own medal.